Break Even
by Pbroken
Summary: One shot based off the song Break Even by The Script. Jake runs off after Eclipse, heartbroken by Bella's rejection, but while drowning his sorrows in a bottle of whiskey he finds what he's been looking for all along. AU


**Okay I have to say I fucking LOVE this one shot! Of course I really love the song so I guess it makes sense. lol This is a one shot based on the song Break Even by The Script. It takes place after Eclipse. Once again I own nothing Twilight and I also don't own the song, but I really am obsessed with both! =) Enjoy and please review!**

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**JPOV(Jake)**

Sitting in a bar in the middle of who knows where drinking a bottle of Jack and drowning my sorrows like a slobbery drunk. That is what my nights consist of. During the day I run, I run as far as I can, but it never seems to be far enough. It's pathetic, I'm pathetic. My chest moves as air circulates through my lungs, but it always feels like I can never get a full breath. I show my fake id to the bartender, and keep my head down not even bothering to wonder if they'll accept it, they always do.

"Just bring me a bottle of Jack," I choke out placing a couple crinkled bills on the bar.

I don't hear anything from the bartender, but the bottle is slipped to me as I start to fall to pieces again. Every night is the same as the night before, praying to a god I don't believe in, consuming a bottle of the best whiskey I've ever had and reliving all the memories, her face, her laugh, her smile. I scowl at the thought. She's with him, not me. I take a large swig out of the bottle, not even recognizing the bitter taste that I noticed when I first started drinking. Her words replay in my head, a broken record that torments me every second.

"_Jake, I love you…So please, don't ask me to choose… because it'll be him, it's always been him," Bella said as she looked hard into my eyes._

My chest heaves in crunching pain as I try to inhale. I don't know what's worse that she said she loved me and broke my heart all in the same sentence or that she meant it, she did love me. I take another large swig of the Jack letting my sobs rack my body. She got it all, freedom, his heart, _my _heart, and none of the pain. I guess it's true what they say hearts don't break even. How am I supposed to handle this? I'm nothing without her. What am I supposed to do when she was the best part of me?! I take an even larger swig of the whiskey gulping it down like its water and I've been in the desert for weeks without it.

She's probably sleeping right now, wrapped up in his stone cold leech embrace. The only sleep I get is when I'm in a drunken haze. I pull the wedding invitation out of my pocket, crinkled and covered in dirt. She would want me to be there, but how could I be? What am I supposed to say when I'm all chocked up and she's okay? He sent me the invite because, unlike me, he puts her first. I should have been there when she jumped off that cliff. I should have been at the tent defending her instead of in that field battling those stupid newborns, but my pride had come first. My _petty _pride! I took another swig, bringing the bottle to half full and just barely feeling the effects. It's the one thing I hated about being a werewolf, I would have to drink at least two bottles to be as piss ass drunk as I wanted to be and I only had enough money for one.

That's always the problem, never enough money. I've got more time than I could ever want to drink myself comatose. It would take at least six bottles of this shit to do that, but if I had the money I would. As it is I had spent the last of my money on this bottle. One would be enough for a couple hours of sleep, which is really what I needed. I hadn't slept in days, fucking nightmares kept me up. It wasn't the same nightmare just different variations of my greatest fears, Bella's perfect bloodsucker losing control and killing her or sometimes changing her into one of them. The nightmares were always there to wake me from peaceful slumber, but not if I had my good friend Jack. No, Jack understands my problems; Jack is the only one that takes the pain away. I stare at the bottle taking another drink of the caramel colored fluid.

"…_your sort of beautiful," Bella whispered as I nursed the large gash on her head._

I wish I could tell her how beautiful she was, even when she tripped or flipped that bike she was stunning. Those entrancing brown eyes and wavy dark brown locks were my reason for living. The memory of that soft hair wrapped in my hand invaded my brain… That kiss, the kiss. The most amazing thing I had ever felt, those soft supple lips against mine her hands in my hair tugging me closer. Fuck! Not mine, not ever mine…My body trembled and I fought back the urge to phase taking another massive gulp out of the almost empty bottle.

"_The worst part…" Bella hesitated, and then she finally spoke the truth. "The worst part is that I saw the whole thing- our whole life. And I want it bad, Jake, I want it all. I want to stay right here and never move. I want to love you and make you happy. And I can't, and it's killing me. It's like Sam and Emily, Jake- I never had a choice. I always knew nothing would change. Maybe that's why I was fighting against you so hard."_

Tears leak from my eyes and I try to push them back. I hate to cry even more I hate to cry in public. Sucking back the tears I swallow down the last of the Jack slamming the bottle onto the bar with a little too much force causing the glass to shatter in my hands. Blood drips from the now large cut in my palm and I close my fist absorbing the sting of the alcohol in my hand as I try to take a few shaky breaths and avoid the memory of the last time I had sliced open my hand… Bella was there for that too. The bartender runs over to clean up the mess as my wounds heal themselves. I stand up mumbling to myself in my now slightly drunk and tired state.

"Fucking hearts don't break even."

Turning my back to leave I hear the clatters of glass as they hit a tub and the slosh of water followed by a voice of an angel.

"No they don't…, one's always still in love while the other ones leaving."

I flip around to see the face that accompanies this voice and it stops me dead in my track. Her face peers up from the bar and her eyes lock with mine. She is gorgeous! The most captivating green eyes I have ever seen, tan skin, long straight black hair, and a simple tag with the name Alisa. Everything stops, at that moment I swear the world stopped spinning. She…it's her… The pull was undeniable even though I was slightly inebriated I could feel it the need to ravish her, protect her and love her filling my deflated heart. Her lips curve up in a smirk and I take a breath, my first full deep breath in weeks before answering with my own.

Hopping over the bar I pull her into my arms, but she doesn't run or call for security. She looks into my eyes and I push her hair out of her face gripping the back of her hair and tugging her lips to mine. I'm filled instantly with heated passion, fire like heat that warms my body the way no amount of alcohol could and all I can do is pull her closer, tug harder as she moans in to my mouth fighting my tongue for dominance with her own. Her small hands wrap around my neck pulling me into a back store room with a cot, probably for late night working. She starts yanking at my tattered shirt with uninhibited need. I rip it from my body and shimmy out of my worn out shorts. Her hands caress my chest, my shoulders, and my back as I groan. She starts panting wildly releasing my lips so she can attack the buttons on her black work shirt. It's taking forever, but it gives me time to stare and time for us to mumble out a few things.

"My name's Alisa, I'm 18. This is my father's bar. I've lived in WI my whole life. I'm a virgin, never found the right guy I guess…," she giggles as she pulls off her shirt and jeans.

"My name's Jake, I'm 17, used a fake id to get in here. I've lived in Washington my whole life. I'm a virgin, but only because I've been waiting for you," I reply without thinking as I rub her cheek with my hand. When I realize what I said I think she's going to run away screaming, but she just gives me a warm smile replying with words that make my cock twitch involuntarily.

"I think I've been waiting for you too…"

I attack her lips with mine again pulling her on to the cot in the corner, that surprisingly smells like it has rarely been used, thank god. Her fresh spring rain scent invades my nostrils making me moan as I unclasp her bra. My hands trail over her firm breasts that fit perfectly in my large masculine hands as she wiggles beneath me making small passionate mewling noises. I attach my lips to her neck moving my way down to the valley between her breasts before encasing my mouth around her taut nipple. She bucks into me and I growl with need running my right hand up her thigh as I continue to suckle on her.

My fingers run through her folds timidly unsure of where to go, but she just continues to moan and whimper urging me own. I push a finger inside of her exploring her slowly as my cock pushes into her hip as I thrust against her instinctively. SHIT! Condom… I release her nipple looking into her eyes and pray that the answer to the question I have to ask will be yes.

"Do you have a condom?" I ask looking into her soft eyes.

She smiles and shakes her head. My face must have looked extremely disappointed because she giggles a little before speaking again.

"I'm on the pill, hormone regulation."

"Thank god!" I growl going back to licking at her nipples moving my hand with fervor now, rubbing my thumb against a small nub that makes her whimper uncontrollably.

I continue my ministrations on the nub rubbing it faster as she starts to arch her back up off the cot.

"Fuck, Jake! Oh god!" she screams and I was really glad that someone had turned the music on or surely someone would have heard that.

Her words make me smirk against her skin and move faster pressing a little harder against the nub as I move my finger in and out of her adding another. Her back pulls all the way off the cot just her shoulders and ass on it as she squeals in delight.

"Oh, fuck! I'm coming…Ugh!"

I growl affectionately as her fluid leaks out over my hand. Holy fuck! That has to be the hottest thing I have ever seen. I need her now! I pull my hand out of her and lick at my fingers, dear god she tastes like fucking heaven. She watches me taste her and I expect her to freak, but all she does is pant wildly and look at me with those green eyes full of hunger.

"I need you, please," she whimpers clawing at my skin.

"As you wish," I whisper in her ear as I nestle myself on my knees between her legs pulling my boxers off and ripping her panties off as well.

I place my cock at her dripping wet entrance and pause. She gives me a nod pulling at my shoulders and attaching her lips to mine again running her nails along my back. I push in to her slowly knowing that it will hurt her and wishing there was a way I could prevent it.

"FUCK!" I pant when her walls envelope my tip.

She was so damn warm, wet, wonderful, oh fuck. She whimpers a little as I push forward holding back the urge to move faster. Finally I come to a stop at her barrier knowing that this is where it will hurt most. I rub my thumb along her nub giving her pleasure that hopefully will distract her some what from the pain. She moans loud as I make circles on it breaking pass her barrier in one swift motion. She winces in pain and I pause not knowing whether I should continue or not. My cock is aching, throbbing against her walls and I want so badly to push into her, to consumer her. After several moments she bucks herself into me taking matters into her own hands as she hisses.

I begin moving slowly within her, in and out as her sounds of pain turn to sounds of pleasure. Wrapping my hands in the tresses of her black hair I lean forward and rest my forehead against hers our moans and my growls filling the small space echoing as I thrust in and out of her.

"Fuck! Alisa," I whisper before her mouth starts to move feverishly over mine again.

After several minutes of sucking on her tongue and lips I release her mouth nuzzling my face into her neck grunting and growling as I pick up the pace feeling her warm walls starting to make little spasms. The pace starts to really pick up, my thrusts becoming more urgent with every tiny movement of her body against mine. I feel my stomach coil with my impending release, but I need her to come first. Pushing my thumb back up against her nub I work it once again in fast circles as she claws at my back.

"Holy Fuck, ugh! I'm so close. Come with me, Jake!" She screams bucking her back of the cot.

I start to move quicker, thrusting wildly against her as I grip her hips, my cock stiffening with my climax.

"JAKE!" She screams and her juices surround me, her walls milking me as I come hard, harder then I ever thought possible growling and filling her as the world becomes a blur.

"ALISA!"

My lips attack hers panting in exhaustion and elation as we both ride the waves of our orgasm, clutching each other for dear life hands everywhere as I collapse onto the cot tugging her into my arms. When I finally release her lips she smiles the most loving smile.

"I think I love you, Jake," she whispers cuddling in to my hold and resting her hand on my chest.

"I love you too, Alisa," I whisper tucking her fallen hair behind her ear. "How do you feel about going to a wedding with me next week?"

"I'll go anywhere with you," she replies nuzzling her head against my chest before she drifts to sleep.

I look up at the ceiling holding her tightly to me.

"Thank you," I whisper into the darkness before throwing my tattered shirt over her like a blanket so she can have a short nap. My heart soars as I take in another deep breath full of her fresh spring rain scent. Nope, hearts don't break even, but bad things happen for a reason.

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**Aw, the dog imprinted how cute! Maybe they can have a puppy that will imprint on Nessie... that would actually be a really adorable story! Hmmm... So now it's time to click the review button and tell me what you think. Thanks for reading!  
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